Overcome Fear In Four Easy Steps
December 31, 2025 Uncategorized Leave a comment
New Year Inspiration - Chapter 1
I cannot remember the exact moment in time when I finally got sick and tired of “being sick and tired”. Afraid of moving forward in my life and said “enough!” I want a better life, I want to be successful in business and I will find a way. I am going to humble myself and ask for help and I am going to get to work – on me. Because I believe I am worth it.
The #1 reason people hesitate on moving forward to pursue what is truly most important in life is nearly always based on fear of some sort. Ranging from absolute paralyzing terror of making mistakes, to negative self-talk, fear can control you!
At the age of eight months I was given away and placed in foster care. I remained in a world of neglect and loss for almost 17 years. Growing up I felt disposable, humiliated, worthless and uncertain that no one would even notice if I didn’t exist. I was labeled an “at risk” youth because I seldom spoke in class.
Once I was on my own I was really on my own. Without a solid foundation of security and support I began my journey in life by dressing the outside for success, while the inside was quivering Jell-O. You can imagine the outcomes. I made a lot of mistakes. I also learned many valuable lessons.
Even the most courageous people have fears to overcome. Maybe you fear failure, change, stepping out of a comfort zone or something else that’s more difficult to pin down. How about negative self-talk?
FEAR is false evidence appearing real.
Fear is usually based on something from the past. If left unaddressed fear can hinder our progress, become self-fulfilling prophesy and keep us from being our personal best in life.
I have four easy steps that will help you to look and move past your fears. While the steps are easy, the commitment you make to yourself to do the work will determine your success.
The first step to overcoming a fear is to acknowledge it.
1. ANALYZING – Writing down your fear helps you see clearly what you are dealing with. Saying your fear out loud, “I am fearful about . . .” helps to loosen the ties it has on you and starts to lesson the power it has over you.
2. TAKE CONTROL - Choose to make the mental shift before taking the physical step. What I mean by this is stopping the negative words or situations that replay in your mind and replace them with positive statements and positive outcomes.
For years I let the fear of public embarrassment and shame keep me from my God-given talent and ability – speaking. I listened to the voices from the past that said “you are not capable” and the ultimate betrayal I believed was the statement I heard the most growing up “you never will.” Today the words I say to myself are completely different from the statements I choose to let define me that were not real. I now say, “I am a successful professional speaker and author.” And guess what? I am!
If you are not there with the words you say and believe about yourself, your life will follow.
Stop running from what you fear the most. Uncover your eyes and look at your fear for exactly what it is. Fear is not real. It’s a bunch of smoke and mirrors designed to keep you from having your best possible life.
3. THINK DIFFERENTLY – Where do you go and who to you find that will help you get the information you want to replace that fear? I’m talking about mentors. These folks are not better than you; they have just had more practice. These are the people that you look up to and admire.
The false perception and pride I had of myself kept me unable to turn to mentors because I thought I had to know everything – to be perfect. Give yourself permission that you don’t know everything. Thinking we know everything there is to know, for me, was a sign of addition – the addiction to perfection. I thought if I acted like I knew everything that would make people notice me and like me.
Perfection is an unattainable illusion. It does not exist. What I have learned is that you can be brilliant at one thing and don’t know much, or anything, about something else and that is ok. The information I take in by admitting, “I don’t know,” replaces fear.
4. CELEBRATE – Each step forward gets you closer to moving past your fear and each time you take a step outside your comfort zone is a reason to celebrate. You get excited as you move forward and empowerment of self grows.
Don’t worry about making mistakes. A mistake made is showing you there is a better way. Find it. Look for the possible.
Many of my fears were based on situations and people from the past and if I allow fear to be present in my life - that means I’m not. I’m somewhere in the past, trying to relieve or rewrite a situation in an attempt to get a different outcome. It’s not possible. Let it go.
Fear is the enemy of success.
Analyze, Take Control, Think Differently and Celebrate. Follow these four steps to overcome your fear and combine them with daily positive self-talk to achieve your personal best. You are all so worth it.
Look for Chapter 2 of New Year Inspiration – Overcome Fear In Four Easy Steps to be published on New Years Day, 2015!
Bonnie Milletto is author of the book, “Dedicated To The Cup, Nine Ways To Reinvent A Life!” An inspirational light, Bonnie is a featured motivational columnist for Willamette Living Magazine. Bonnie is a popular keynote speaker and expert on the topic of empowerment, overcoming fear and providing exemplary customer service. Her website is www.bonniemilletto.com She is available to speak to your group. Email Bonnie at [email protected] for more information.
Cheers to you!
December 24, 2025 Uncategorized Leave a comment
CHEERS to you and yours!
Thank you, each one of you, for following me.
Thanks for sticking with me in 2014. This past year has been filled with changes, good changes, and it’s been a challenging and rewarding transition from the corporate world into the wonderful world of the creative entrepreneur, which has also meant that I haven’t been able to post as often as I’d like. However, I am extremely grateful to be following my life’s passion and sharing my hope with others.
My hope is that my speaking and writing continues to inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more.
I’m still creating. I have a whole lot more to share with you in 2015.
Happy holidays, my inspiring friends, and a heartfelt amazingly wonderful 2015 to you.
Bonnie Milletto is author of the book, “Dedicated To The Cup, Nine Ways To Reinvent A Life!” An inspirational light, Bonnie is a featured motivational columnist for Willamette Living Magazine. Bonnie is also a keynote speaker and expert on the topic of empowerment, overcoming fear and providing exemplary customer service. She is available to speak to your group. Email Bonnie at [email protected] for more information or email via the contact form on this site.
Two Words
December 14, 2025 Uncategorized Leave a comment
We use words every day to communicate, to express our feelings and thoughts. We often forget how powerful they can be and how important it is to choose them with care if we wish to attract happiness and success.
Often, words from others control our emotions in both positive and negative ways. They can instill anger, bring happiness, give us hope and make us cry. Negative words can – destroy an individual’s sense of value and self-worth.
Why do we judge our happiness based off the words given from others when we have the power to inspire ourselves with the words that really matter – the words we say to ourselves. It’s not what you say out of your mouth that determines your life - it’s what you whisper to yourself that has the most power.
Two words have the power to destroy or empower us. The two words that can both create and destroy – I Am.
I am – the two most powerful words in the world, for whatever we put after them becomes our reality. - Susan Howson
Changing the scripts that run through our head means calling upon our inner strength to retrain our brains. Moving beyond old messages requires a new narrative. What do you need to let go? And what are the new messages that will take its place? Visualize what you want, write it down and take tangible steps toward making that happen – every day.
Negative thoughts weaken your courage and drain your energy. They often stop you from taking inspired action and believing in yourself. Even many successful entrepreneurs with the right mindset aren’t immune to negative thinking. They acknowledge their negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones.
Affirmations and mantras such as “I can succeed” might seem silly to some people, but I’ve seen affirmations work more times than I can count. Affirmations are simple prewritten and positive statements that you say to yourself over and over again. I have a new line that will be hitting the retail market in 2015 and you can preview the line at www.essentialinspiration.net Affirmations create positive thought processes – which leads to positive change.
Remember to be gentle on yourself when you are trying your best. Even when you stumble and fall, you are still falling forward. Sometimes you need to fail to learn what you need to succeed. Failure is actually a gift that is telling you “hey, there is a better way!”
Persistence is key. For success, you must persist in spite of obstacles, challenges, stress, ups and downs and your darkest days.
Change the words you say to yourself and write a new amazing script to reach your goals and realize your best life possible. Start with two powerful words “I AM . . .”
Cheers to you and your success!
I want to extend a challenge. I challenge you to wake up on January 1 and look at yourself in the mirror. Look at yourself longer than might be comfortable until you start to see past your face and you begin to see who you are. Then say the things out loud to yourself that you wish that others would say to you. Share these words with yourself daily and see how everyone and everything around you changes.
So now I ask you – what will you say to inspire yourself to move toward your goals? Share your answers with me at [email protected] and contribute to the “I Am Movement! For the next 10 weeks I am committed to exploring the lives, stories and passions of people with the goal of bringing your inspiration to light to ignite inspiration in others.
Bonnie Milletto is author of the book, “Dedicated To The Cup, Nine Ways To Reinvent A Life!” An inspirational light, Bonnie is a featured motivational columnist for Willamette Living Magazine. Bonnie is also a keynote speaker and expert on the topic of empowerment, overcoming fear and providing exemplary customer service. Her website is www.bonniemilletto.com She is available to speak to your group. Email Bonnie at [email protected] for more information on volume discounts for her book and positive affirmation collections.
Giving Back ~ Bernadette Basilio, SAFES Women Shelter
November 13, 2025 inspiration, motivational, speaking, Uncategorized Leave a comment
With freezing temperatures, The Salvation Army SAFES at Fairbridge female emergency shelter is seeing a massive increase in women looking for shelter from the cold, wind, and rain.
This Friday, November 14, 2014, the women in the shelter as well as the public will find additional inner warmth as they welcome Bonnie Milletto, an International Motivational Speaker and Author, for a transformational session called “Connecting Inner Beauty and Outer Beauty,” that will include 3 complete makeovers of current clients.
The event will be from 10am-1pm at SAFES at Fairbridge, located at 30 SW 2nd Ave, Portland, OR 97204.
During her presentation, Bonnie will be telling her story about “Finding Beauty, Strength, and Empowerment From The Inside Out,” inspiring women everywhere to know how beautiful they are. Following her presentation, 3 very special women who have demonstrated great motivation and success in the program at SAFES will be receiving a makeover transformation, provided by Blow Out, A Blow Dry Bar and Hands of Favor staff.
“This event means so much to the women. For many, they are struggling with their own inner and outer beauty, and we want them to know that every single one of them is beautiful and they can be the woman they’ve always wanted to be,” says Bernadette Basilio, Director at SAFES at Fairbridge. “We are especially looking forward to providing three of our women with the opportunity to be pampered. We are so thankful for Bonnie and for the team from Blow Out to help spread some extra warmth to our clients.” - Bernadette Basilio
SAFES at Fairbridge is a shelter for women experiencing homelessness with services that include case management, which targets housing and income stabilization. SAFES recently opened 45 extra mats in their shelter for the Winter, just in time for the current frigid weather. This is on top of the already 50 beds they provide year-round, with a waitlist of 200 women looking for shelter. SAFES is the largest low-barrier shelter for women in Portland and is expanding its services in the upcoming months as an additional 42 supportive housing units are under construction. Staff at SAFES is working tirelessly to get women off the streets and into housing, and by providing opportunities like this motivational speaker session, they are truly taking it to the next level to support these women.
Please join us for an afternoon of warming people from the inside out at a time when more and more women need some warming up!
Bernadette B. Basilio
Director of SAFES Women Shelter
30 SW 2nd Ave Portland, OR 97204
p:971-202-5356 f: 503-224-0158
Personal Note From Bonnie: I have visited the SAFES Shelter in Portland, OR several times and thought to myself what I could do to give back and lend a hand to those less fortunate. In addition to speaking and inviting my friends at the Blow Out Bar to weave their magic, along with the amazing nonprofit organization, Hands Of Favor, I will be gifting artwork - positive affirmation poster images for their newly painted walls. http://www.essentialinspiration.net The first step toward positive change is changing the words you say to yourself. Sometimes, we all need a little inspiration.
Let the reason for the season speak to your heart - help another to step up in your own unique way.
Be Careful What You Say, You Are Listening
July 24, 2025 inspiration, motivational, Uncategorized Leave a comment
Your perceptions of life, whether true or false, make you the person you are. Your thoughts (both positive and negative) and judgements about yourself and your environment combine to create your reality. Reprogramming your thoughts through the use of affirmations allows you to move towards accomplishing your personal and professional goals.
Positive affirmations are short, positive statements targeted at a specific, subconscious set of beliefs. Affirmations are used to challenge negative beliefs and to replace them with positive, self-nurturing beliefs.
www.essentialinspiration.net
Every thought you think, every word you say is an affirmation. Our beliefs are learned thought patterns that we have developed since childhood.
An old pattern is not a set pattern. The first step toward positive change is to change your outlook by changing the words you say to yourself.
Sometimes, all we need is a little inspiration!
Cheers!
Changing Direction: Three questions to ask yourself now
July 8, 2025 Uncategorized Leave a comment
Changing direction in life can be exhilarating and at the same time somewhat unsettling. I have reinvented what I do several times as I transitioned through careers and the stages in life, filling roles I never thought possible: speaker, motivator, mentor, and author. So what’s next?
In my search to define who I am and my purpose in life, I asked several close friends who have known me for years to help clarify, in their opinion, who I am. I found asking this question was challenging, although not because I was afraid of what it would reveal. I think the challenge related to my former sense of value and the belief I had in myself to succeed in a new direction—a direction that truly makes a difference.
Through this process certain words emerged—fun, inspirational, reliable, dedicated, empowering, and at times insecure. What? Insecure?
Okay, I can live with that. I will continue to be a work in progress and be kind to myself by allowing for a side step along the way. Hey, we are all human. We all have some of the same frailties and insecurities. The goal is to strive to the best version of you.
As I wrote in my first blog a year ago, I had been listening to the external voices to define who I was, what I should be, and how far I could go in a chosen endeavor. Why was it so hard to give myself the permission to craft my own course and believe all things are possible?
That, my friends, is the million-dollar question that can lead us to the richness of the answer.
I am an encourager to many, and yet if I am being totally honest, I knew I was holding myself back.
Why? Again, the million-dollar question!
These are the three questions I used to evaluate my direction:
- Is the work you are doing truly serving you?
- Is your life as meaningful as you would like?
- Are you aware of your personal value?
To me, personal value equals inner strength, which will support you in staying true to who you are and keep you inspired. My value is going up each time I push myself closer to the edge of a comfort zone and I live to tell the story.
My stories inspire and empower others to take action in their own lives, to break down the walls of fear that can derail us from our desired outcome.
Believe in the power within you. It’s been there all along. All things ARE possible. It starts with a single power of choice, and the choice is all yours!
Cheers!
Leap Of Faith
May 28, 2025 Uncategorized Leave a comment
Life is too short and far to precious to waste time.
Time for a leap of faith?
Take it!
It’s yours.
Only The Lonely
March 22, 2026 book, inspiration, speaking, Uncategorized Leave a comment
Meet my friend, Michelle.
Everything she touches is magical. Today she touched my heart in a big way.
A postponed event and a forgotten call to Michelle left her with flowers galore. What to do? She gave them all away!
Recycled containers, mostly tin cans and such, became beautiful once more as she left arrangements on sidewalks, at restaurants and more. From Vancouver through Portland and Beaverton too, her please adopt me today, I’m “The Lonely Bouquet” brought sunshine into the homes they now will stay.
I’M INSPIRED!
My home adopted one of the thoughtfully “abandoned” celebrations of Spring and I will remember this random act of kindness to others, forever.
Only the lonely?
Not when Michelle comes to town!
Cheers!
_______________________________
STORIES. GET INSPIRED! Find your inspiration in Bonnie’s book, “Dedicated To The Cup, Nine Ways To Reinvent A Life!” A collection of real-life inspirational stories with chapters that address different themes, including courage, confidence, perfection, gratitude and legacy, and features “story sips” from the cups of life of 16 people Bonnie has met along her journey as an international speaker.
Dedicated To The Cup may be purchased on Amazon for Kindle, in audio download, eBook format or in paperback through bonniemilletto.com/book. For more information or booking Bonnie, visit bonniemilletto.com.
Too Busy For You!
March 16, 2026 Uncategorized Leave a comment
“I’m too busy” used to be my go-to mantra.
What a convenient over used saying. Who was I trying to convince? No one really buys this crap. If I try, I can always find a reason not to do something I want to do or have committed to do and I can come up with a perfect justification to go along with it. I can be that good at making an excuse. Again, no one really buys this, let alone me.
“Busyness” can be an easy excuse. I have learned when our priorities are right, we are never too busy for those we care about the most, and the activities we choose.
“Most of us are not ‘too busy;’ few of us have the ‘full plate’ we think or say we have.”
I have also learned caring and time sharing to support, encourage and inspire is a two-way street. If you want to receive, you had better learn how to give. Having an attitude of entitlement, with an expectation that everyone will rally around you in time of need or celebration, without demonstrating this behavior to others, will eventually find you alone and wondering “where did everyone go?”
Carrying someone in your heart and mind is a wonderful thing, but reaching out physically to those you care about builds the bond, letting them know you are within reach. At the end of the day (or the beginning, or the middle) most of us have the time to do the things we say we can’t. We all have the same hours in each day, and we all have the potential, to use them to do what we want to do.
While it may be easier for some of us, it’s possible for all of us to reach out to those and what matters most.
Start with five minutes.
Five minutes that will translate into “I’m not too busy for what matters most. I’m not too busy for you.”
Make the time.
5 Tips on Getting Past Your Fears and Embracing Success in 2014
December 30, 2025 inspiration, Uncategorized Leave a comment
“No one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” - Carl Bard
What’s the No. 1 reason people hesitate on moving forward to pursue what is truly most important in life? I’ve found it to be nearly always fear of some form. Ranging from absolutely paralyzing terror of making mistakes to negative self-talk, fear can control you.
Some of the top thought leaders in America have also noted that success is tied to believing in yourself; being vulnerable and taking risks; and breaking those self-imposed limits. Success mentor Jack Canfield encourages us to move beyond our emotionally unhealthy behaviors and finally create the life and results we desire. Oprah recently interviewed professor of social work, Brene Brown, PhD, LMSW about being vulnerable by living and loving with your full heart.
Here are 5 tips to help you overcome your fears and capture success in 2014!1. Believe in yourself
Have faith in your abilities. Believe that you CAN, BE, and DO anything you set your mind to. Believe in yourself, and others will believe in you. Picture yourself as succeeding. Dream with your eyes wide open and work to make your dreams come true.
It’s not just about what you say; it’s about how you live your life every day. Everything you do or say is like a mirror that reflects back to you. Who do you want people to see when they look into your mirror? Your actions will speak for themselves.2. Take a risk
Make a small or large step in the direction of your dreams and don’t be afraid to fail. Successful people always have more failures in their lives. People who have no failures also have few successes. Everybody gets knocked down—the key is to get back up!
So what do you want to achieve or bring into your life this year? Have the courage to take that first step – just one small step forward.Your small daily steps will lead to BIG results.3. Compare to no one
When we compare ourselves to others we will always come in last. There will always be someone smarter, more beautiful, thinner, fatter, younger, older, richer, faster…STOP! Don’t waste time chasing after the dreams of others.
You have everything you need within you to become the best possible version of YOU. What you are today is already more than enough. What you choose to add to your life tomorrow will be your cherry on top!4. Choose to be happy
As Abraham Lincoln said, “People are just about as happy as they made their minds up to be.” It does not get much simpler than that. When you get up in the morning, you always have two choices: to be happy or to be unhappy. That is all there is to it. Choose to be happy.
Simply knowing happiness is a choice, is not enough. Fully experiencing it requires a conscience decision to do so each day. Practice happy thinking every day. When a negative thought comes to mind, deliberately replace a positive thought to cancel it out.5. Be grateful for everything in your life and love yourself
Did you know that the very best way to bring good things into your life is to be grateful for the good things that you already have? We each have a lot to be grateful for. No matter how good or bad you think you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life. Someone somewhere is desperately fighting for theirs.
List all the people in your life you are grateful for; then list all the things that are positive in your life. When we are grateful it is an expression of self-acceptance. Needs and fears go out the window.Love yourself despite feeling unlovable. We may be flawed, but we’re all worthy of love and respect.
2014 can be your year to succeed if you take hold of your life with confidence. Name your fears and then take action! Take the daily small steps forward and watch your fears disappear.
2014 – YOU are in control!
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STORIES. GET INSPIRED! Find your confidence and inspiration in Bonnie’s book, Dedicated to the Cup, a collection of real-life inspirational stories with chapters that address different themes, including courage, confidence, perfection, and gratitude, and features “sips” from the cups of life of 16 different people Bonnie has met along her journey as an international speaker.
Dedicated to the Cup may be purchased on Amazon for Kindle, in audio download, eBook format or in paperback through bonniemilletto.com/book. For more information, visit bonniemilletto.com.
